Stupid Quotes by Famous People

– said during ‘Perseverance Month’

Better make it six, I can’t eat eight. – Bill Clinton, former U.S. I got it from my dad. – when asked what the White house was like by a student in East London

Half this game is ninety percent mental. – Dan Osinski, Baseball pitcher, when a waitress asked whether he wanted his pizza cut into six or eight slices

Families is where our nation finds hope, where wings take dream.

Pitching is 80% of the game. – Dizzy Dean explaining to the media how he felt after being hit on the head by a ball in the 1934 World Series

We are not without accomplishment. President

Sure, it’s going to kill a lot of people, but they may be dying of something else anyway. I have quoted a few of these ‘golden words’ (read celebrity stupid quotes), that really shouldn’t be repeated for the general good of humanity.

We’re going to turn this team around 360 degrees. You gotta preserve. And not ones to be left behind, sports commentators are rivaling so with sportsmen to aid the cause of stupid quotes by celebrities (and it doesn’t help that most of their commentary is live).

Men, I want you just thinking of one word all season. Given below is a list of political faux pas that will leave you in splits.

I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully.

I think that gay marriage is something that should be between a man and a woman. and then dehale! – Maury Wills, Los Angeles Dodgers captain, leading his teammates through warm-up calisthenics

He’s a guy who gets up at six o’clock in the morning regardless of what time it is. – Shaquille O’Neal, basketball player, after game 4 of the 2001 NBA finals, on being asked by NBC reporter Jim Gray if LA had learned a lesson from what happened the previous year in Indiana

I may be dumb, but I’m not stupid. – Senior basketball player at the University of Pittsburgh

Politics gives guys so much power that they tend to behave badly around women. – Lawrence Summers, chief economist of the World Bank, explaining why we should export toxic wastes to Third World countries

If your parents never had children, chances are you won’t either. I want to make somebody’s life just a little bit better.

I cannot tell you how grateful I am — I am filled with humidity. All the guys on the team were Italians. That’s the America I love. – David Coleman, Sports commentator. – Shaquille O’Neal, basketball player, on whether he had visited the Parthenon during his visit to Greece

I don’t think we learned a lesson; I think it was a learning experience for us. It lies in the hearts and souls of Americans. We understand where the power of this country lay. We have managed to distribute poverty equally. We have a firm commitment to Europe. – Greg Norman, Golfer

Traditionally, most of Australia’s imports come from overseas.

Sure there have been injuries and deaths in boxing – but none of them serious. Sorry, NO! They always want to get that money shot. Especially about the future. – Dan Quayle, former U.S. Well, you know what? He wasn’t the only one! Read this famous list of Bushisms to see why our 43rd President was the favorite punching bag of comedians all over the world:

They misunderestimated me.

And now the sequence of events, in no particular order. – Dan Quayle, former U.S. – Marion Barry, mayor of Washington, D.C.

Politicians are just as famous for their well rehearsed and practiced speeches, as they are for their slip-ups when they need to speak without the luxury of a speech writer. Most celebrities, without the scripts in their hand, may end saying funny things, which are actually good enough to make it to the next Woody Allen movie. – Bill Peterson, Florida State football coach

It’s only puffy when it’s swollen. So barring a few rare sports personalities, most sports icons end up saying the silliest things before the camera. And then there are quotes which have the same effect of inspiring us, but in completely different ways – they make us thank God that at least we’re not that dumb. Vice-President

I’d run over my own mother to win the Super Bowl. – Dick Cavett, former talk show host

Leaving the best for the last, let’s face it! This list simply isn’t complete without the dumb doses from our very own Dumbyaman… It’s what you do when you run for president. – Peter Snow, BBC2 anchorman

I think war is a dangerous place.

I have opinions of my own –strong opinions– but I don’t always agree with them.

I do not like this word “bomb.” It is not a bomb. Vice President

In a sense it’s a one-man show… And I hope I never get into that. – Danny Ozark, Philadelphia Phillies manager

We are not ready for an unforeseen event that may or may not occur. – Marilyn Manson, Singer

I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were ever supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever. – Lou Duva, veteran boxing trainer, on the Spartan training regime of heavyweight Andrew Golota

Every city I go to is an opportunity to paint, whether it’s Omaha or Hawaii. They were just a lot better than we thought. – Alicia Silverstone, Actress

Whenever I watch TV and I see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can’t help but cry. – John Motson, BBC1

I have a God-given talent. – Frank Bruno, Boxer

That’s just the tip of the ice cube. – Philip Streifer, Superintendent of Schools, Barrington, Rhode Island

How’s it going, Sunshine? – Barack Obama, President of the United States, at Sunrise, Florida

I’ve never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body. After reading these, the next time you sit down to pray, do thank the Lord, for blessing you with the cognitive ability of knowing what to say, but more importantly knowing what not to say. We are a part of Europe. If you’re killed, you’ve lost a very important part of your life. I will continue to articulate what I believe and what I believe — I believe what I believe is right. I think it was deep in the way that it was very light. President

I’m so smart now. – Dan Quayle, former U.S. – Gib Lewis, speaker of the Texas House

Too many good docs are getting out of the business. – Neil Hamilton, BBC2

I think it’s very important for the American president to mean what he says. It must lay in our pocketbooks. One word and one word only: Super Bowl. – Murray Walker, Sportscaster

We have a firm commitment to NATO, we are a part of NATO. Oops, I mean Dubyaman. – Julian Wakefield, Missouri basketball player

There are quotes that inspire you, help you when you feel down and out, and act as a driving force to help you strike back at your problem with a vengeance. – Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward

Rarely is the question asked: Is our children learning?

I don’t diet. – Jason Kidd upon his drafting to the Dallas Mavericks

The FA are still optimistic about England’s bid to stage the World Cup in twenty thousand and six. I’m not stupid. Our weakness is that we don’t have any real strengths. – Barbara Boxer, Senator

And here’s Moses Kiptanui – the 19 year old Kenyan, who turned 20 a few weeks ago. Vice President on the concept of a manned mission to Mars

I’m going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes. I appreciate preservation. – Britney Spears

I didn’t realize I was in a Buddhist temple. Bush – We Rest our Case

If you take out the killings, Washington actually has a very low crime rate. Too many OB-GYNs aren’t able to practice their love with women all across this country.

We now have exactly the same situation as we had at the start of the race, only exactly the opposite. – Bill Clinton, former U.S. I just don’t eat as much as I’d like to. – Nguyen Co Thatch, Vietnamese foreign minister

It is wonderful to be here in the great state of Chicago. – Joe Jacoby, NFL Football player, of the Washington Redskins

George W. Thus, their funniest and often inadvertent, but undoubtedly hilarious quotes are those that are said at press conferences and interviews. Vice President

Put the ‘off’ button on.

For most people, death comes at the end of their lives. except there are two men involved, Hartson and Berkovic, and a third man, the goalkeeper. – Jacques le Blanc, French ambassador on nuclear weapons

I was glad to see Italy win. Yes, the ex-President, at the end of his Presidency, said that he was extremely relieved to not be the President anymore. – Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for a federal anti-smoking campaign.

I’ve coined new words, like, misunderstanding and Hispanically.

The California crunch really is the result of not enough power-generating plants and then not enough power to power the power of generating plants.

I’ll fight Lloyd Honeyghan for nothing, if the price is right. But as importantly, it lies in the fact that we’ve got citizens from all walks of life, all political parties, that are willing to say, I want to love my neighbor. – Dan Quayle, former U.S. – Tony Bennett, Singer

I’ve never really wanted to go to Japan. I mean I would love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff. – Mickey Rivers, baseball player

To win, I’d run over Joe’s mom too. – Matt Millen, NFL Football player, of the Raiders

I think that the film Clueless was very deep. – Othal Brand, member of a Texas pesticide review board, on chlordane

You teach a child to read, and he or her will be able to pass a literacy test.

I just want you to know that, when we talk about war, we’re really talking about peace.

Okay, everyone, now inhale… Being Politically (In)correct

I’ve always thought that underpopulated countries in Africa are vastly under-polluted. It is a device that is exploding. So read on to find out what was the stupidest thing said by your favorite celebrity:

Smoking kills. – Tommy Lasorda, former Dodger manager on World Cup soccer tournament

After finding no qualified candidates for the position of principal, the school board is extremely pleased to announce the appointment of David Steele to the post. Vice President when asked about his illegal fundraising activities that took place in a Buddhist temple

If we don’t succeed, we run the risk of failure. – Miss Alabama, in the 1994 Miss Universe contest, when asked if she would want to live forever

I’m someone who has a deep emotional attachment to Starsky and Hutch. – Charles de Gaulle, former French President

Guys aren’t able to get $15 or $20 million anymore, so you have to play for the love of the game. – Gib Lewis, Texas Speaker of the House, to a group of people in wheelchairs on Disability Day

It’s time for the human race to enter the solar system! – Dan Quayle, former U.S. – Bill Peterson, football coach

Those who survived the San Francisco earthquake said, “Thank God, I’m still alive.” But, of course, those who died, their lives will never be the same again. – Lamar Alexander, former Secretary of Education, explaining his ideas on what parents of children who attend poorly funded urban or rural schools should do to solve the problem

This is Preservation Month. – Mitt Romney

Boxing’s all about getting the job done as quickly as possible, whether it takes 10 or 15 or 20 rounds. Vice President

I know how hard it is for you to put food on your family.

The doctors X-rayed my head and found nothing. – Linda Evangelista, Supermodel

Beauty and brains is a rare enough combination, but when it comes to Hollywood and the music industry, it’s still rarer. – Mariah Carey, Pop Singer

I get to go to lots of overseas places, like Canada – Britney Spears, Pop Singer

If it weren’t for electricity we’d all be watching television by candlelight. – George Gobel, actor and comedian

You should always go to other people’s funerals, otherwise, they won’t come to yours. – Madonna

I say no to drugs, but they don’t listen. The other half is hitting and fielding. – GLR broadcaster, UK

We didn’t underestimate them. – Terry Bradshaw, Former football player/announcer

It is white. And I know that’s very popular out there in Africa. – Bobby Robson, after the 1990 World Cup Finals match against Cameroon

If you’re living in an area with a bad school, move to a place where there’s a better school.

Yes, sometimes it’s astonishing what people can say on camera, without thinking twice (or even once for that matter). It lies in the willingness for people to work hard. – Paris Hilton

Our strength is that we don’t have any weaknesses. – Yogi Berra, former American Major League Baseball player

Hit or Miss?

So, where’s the Cannes Film Festival being held this year? – Christina Aguilera

I know what I believe. – Former Australian cabinet minister Keppel Enderbery

China is a big country, inhabited by many Chinese. – Marlon Starling

So this was your, well, not daily, but a lifetime’s dose of stupid quotes. Simply because I don’t like eating fish. – Alan Minter, Boxer

Lights, Camera, Errrr….

I believe in an America where millions of Americans believe in an America that’s the America millions of Americans believe in. – Arnold Schwarzenegger

Sportsmen were never particularly well-known for their intellect. – Frank Broyles, College football coach

I think we’re making progress. – Ivana Trump, on finishing her first novel

I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father. I think lightness has to come from a very deep place if it’s true lightness. – Dan Rather, television news anchor

You guys have to run a little more than full speed out there. Amen!

Predictions are difficult. – Penny Hardaway, NBA Basketball Player

I can’t really remember the names of the clubs that we went to. Everyone’s always like ‘take your top off’. – Al Gore, former U.S. – Charlie Hough, Baseball player, talking about his broken finger

My sister’s expecting a baby, and I don’t know if I’m going to be an uncle or an aunt. That’s why I understand that the enemy could misread what I say. That’s why I try to be as clearly as I can.

And now, will y’all stand and be recognized. – Chuck Nevitt, North Carolina State basketball player, telling Coach Jim Valvano why he appeared nervous at practice

Fiction writing is great, you can make up almost anything. – Yogi Berra, Baseball player

Listen, everyone is entitled to my opinion

Leave a Comment